anxiety

so, back before the baby i could sleep pretty good i guess.

i would do 3 things

1) sleep through the night, snore a bit, get elbowed in the back, then wake up when i'm hot (95%)

2) sleep through most of the night, sit up cause my lungs would collapse. So when i sit up it's easier for me to breathe. (after getting the bed in the new house I have only done this 1 time i think) (1%)

3) I sleep through half the night and I freaking wake up cause i think there is a spider falling on my face, or more common now with the baby i think i just kicked the baby off the bed. (4%)

I did this 2 times one night! the last time was this weekend and i had to jump out of bed, grab my glassed, turn on the desk light and search frantically if ally was under the bed. then i reallized "she doesn't even sleep in here!"

but i was so freaking tired i slept with my glasses, yes with my glasses. If u know how anal i am about taking care of glasses u know what i mean. but jess came in and took them off for me.

i wonder what is making my nights so crazy. my heart jumps like crazy. my dream seemed so real, i could see her roll, roll, roll, fall off the bed. i about had a sleep heart attack.